I'M ONE OF YOU

You know it's true
That I'm one of you
But you never knew

You're one of me

HAIKU #87

Bad things make us bad
Or bad things can make us good
There's always a choice

HAIKU #86

Superman in bed
What could possibly go wrong?
Kryptonite dildos

HAIKU #85

It's the way she moves
There's music in each gesture
Heaven in each breath

DON'T HATE. HIBERNATE.

We eat fruit
We eat fruit
We eat fruit
We eat fruit
We eat fruit
We eat fruit
Feels. Like. Floating.

HAIKU #84

If disadvantaged
Reshape your environment
To your advantage

HAIKU #83

Evil is boring
Selfish and predictable
Good fascinates me

ENDORSEMENT 11

Hey there, honey. Obviously it's me. I know this is like the fifth video I've sent you today, but I don't know how else to reach you since you moved into the backyard and changed all the access combinations on our treehouse. Look, sweetheart, every marriage has its rough patches, but that doesn't mean you have to continue sleeping in the backyard like all the other unhappy housewives in this neighborhood. You've made your statement loud and clear, so why not come inside for a nice cup of Folgers Coffee and see if we can just put this whole mess behind us where it belongs? You may have noticed I'm even playing that Annie Lennox song you like. Enough is enough already. I love you. Let's make up.

Folgers Coffee. Come in from the backyard.

HAIKU #82

Keep moving forward
You can travel anywhere
One step at a time

HAIKU #81

I'll reveal myself
For the right girl to save me
Oops, I meant "shave me"

HAIKU #80

If you see clearly
You'll discover many fools
But no enemies

RED BULL GIVES YOU WINGS

I drink Red Bull
Till I wake up
Till I'm energized

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm giddy
Till my body shakes

I drink Red Bull
Till my gums itch
Till my teeth come loose

I drink Red Bull
Till my face swells
Till my lips fall off

I drink Red Bull
Till my head morphs
Till I grow a beak

I drink Red Bull
Till my skin crawls
Till my feathers sprout

I drink Red Bull
Till my legs shrink
Till I form a tail

I drink Red Bull
Till my arms hurt
Till they turn to wings

I drink Red Bull
Till I panic
Till I fly away

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm soaring
Till I see the world

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm homesick
Till I've flown too far

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm puzzled
Till I lose my way

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm stranded
Till I'm all alone

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm idle
Till my mind decays

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm restless
Till I'm paranoid

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm crazy
Till I'm not myself

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm screaming
Till I make no sense

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm hopeless
Till I'm truly lost

I drink Red Bull
Till I'm rescued
Till I've made new friends

I drink Red Bull
With some pirates
I'm their parrot now

HAIKU #79

You're not what you eat
You are what you think about
Think about good things

HAIKU #78

Animals have sex
Humans should aspire to more
We were made for love

HAIKU #77

Advertisers hunt
Aiming to domesticate
To tame our wild minds