I watched a movie over the weekend that I thought was surprisingly good. Then I saw online that it has gotten mostly really bad reviews. The reason, it seems, is that people don't understand what the movie is about. Without giving too much away, the movie in question is marketed as a typical Hollywood celebration of vengeance. But the actual movie is the opposite—a refreshing condemnation of it. I don't want to discuss the movie any further except to say it occurred to me that it would in fact seem like a bad movie if you didn't understand what the story was about.

Now let me repeat that thought, because I think it applies to much more than the occasional misunderstood movie. I think it often applies to life itself: It would seem like a bad movie if you didn't understand what the story was about.

Each of our lives tells a story. The thing is, more often than not it isn't the story we expect or the one we think we want. Given the choice, I think most of us would want our life to be a feel-good story of success and acceptance. We'd prefer a life that's relatively easy, productive, and fun. After all, that's what we see in the majority of popular TV shows and movies. And especially in ads.

But when you think about it, those aren't the best stories. The best, most rewarding stories are about overcoming obstacles and learning difficult lessons—often subtle, complex, counterintuitive ones. So when life seems like a bad movie, one we'd rather not watch, we should ask ourselves: What kind of story is this? What's it really about? When life fails to be the feel-good, lighthearted comedy or action movie we think we want, it could be that we're in the middle of a much better, far more rewarding story and we just don't understand it yet.