I've been thinking about the way people are attracted to mysteries. This is true both when it comes to stories and when it comes to other people. "Isn't it mysterious?" "Isn't he/she so mysterious?" There's something romantic about the notion of a mystery. We're fascinated by the strange and the unknown. The problem is, most of what we consider mysterious has nothing to do with real mystery.

A real mystery is something that we're as of yet unable to solve or explain. The key word here is "unable." A lot of the time we consider something or someone mysterious when, in fact, we could easily solve the mystery if we wanted to and tried. The easiest example of this would be if you've ever gone to school or worked with someone you considered mysterious. "I wonder what he/she is thinking. I wonder what he/she is like." Well, if you walked up and asked, he/she would probably tell you. Unless you tried that and the person refused, there was never any real mystery. There was only something easily knowable that you didn't bother to know.

A lot of the time we create a false sense of mystery by not investigating the things we find mysterious. And I think the reason we do this is because, more often than not, the romance of the mystery is better than the realization of the truth. Chances are, if you went up and talked to the person you thought was mysterious, he or she would share with you some rather mundane thoughts and opinions. It's the same thing that usually happens at the end of a mysterious TV series: We're drawn in by the thrill of the mystery, and ultimately disappointed when there's no real pay-off. Consequently, we've learned to extend the illusion of our false mysteries as long as we can.

But it seems to me that we should try not to be seduced by the empty romance of mysteries that aren't real mysteries. If we find something or someone mysterious in an alluring way, we should respond not by keeping our distance but by trying to find out more. Oftentimes we'll discover that we're capable of getting to the bottom of things. And when this is the case, there's either going to be a pay-off or there's not. We either uncover something truly worthwhile and interesting, or we "ruin the mystery" by discovering there was never anything underneath. But the thing is, it's good either way. What's important is that we learn to value things and people based on their actual qualities, rather than merely valuing the illusion of what's easily knowable yet continues to be unknown.

At the end of the day, there are plenty of real mysteries in the world. If we're looking for the romance of the strange and the unknown, we don't need to resort to deluding ourselves with false mysteries. And even if we set aside the notion of the mysterious, there are still plenty of things worth investigating, stories worth hearing, and people worth knowing. But nothing was ever worthwhile by virtue of being mysterious alone. We should think of a mystery only as an invitation to explore. And it is through exploration that we might discover real value and actual romance, not in the mystery itself.